Paint Your Face With MIcrobes!

The FDA has just released a statement informing the public that face paints manufactured by Shanghai Color Art Stationery Company Limited, Shanghai, China, are being voluntarily recalled by Fun Express Inc., a wholly-owned subsidiary of Oriental Trading Co.

But who owns the Oriental Trading Company, who, by the way, is celebrating 75 years of fun (by taking the fun out of face paint and replacing it with a burning sting)?

Oriental Trading Company website states that the company is owned by "The Carlyle Group, a global private equity firm. Brentwood Associates, a private equity firm, owns a significant minority ownership stake."

(The word oriental is very offensive, if you don't believe me ask someone from Asia or go to your local china town(offensive, but has become colloquial) and scream the word, at that point if you had a fortune cookie on you, I don't think you'd have to crack it open to find out what the future has in store for you. Also oriental doesn't even refer to China. The term refers to what ws once the Persian empire and its surrounding areas).

The Carlyle group loves management-led buyouts in which they provide the equity for. "In a management buyout, or leveraged buyout, managers of public corporations get together with banks or other lenders to buy out the public stockholders and turn the company into a private entity — at least for a time," wrote Ben Stein in a September 2006 article in the New York Times.

In fairness the Carlyle group has other practices in its bag of tricks such as strategic minority equity investments, equity private placements, consolidations and buildups, and growth capital financings, all of which I don't understand. However they do what they do, it works because they seem to own part of everything possibly including your colon (you'd better get that checked out).


The recall is due to reports of adverse skin reactions in children. The FDA found elements of microbes in the paint when the agency performed tests and thought it would be a good idea if we didn't use their product for a bit.

Looks like these are going in the closet for a little while, sorry kids:

Even though this recall is about the microbes let's just look at the ingredients kids are putting on their faces, microbes or not.

Pariffin Wax is basically used in candles. It is a good conductor of heat. It is obtained from petroleum by dewaxing light lubricating oil stocks

Petrolatum is petroleum jelly or it's most popular manufacturer Vaseline. There are tons of uses for the product such as removing water rings from furniture and but I think this is the best:



Though the British don't find it too useful.

Petrolatum - Impurities in Petroleum Jelly or commonly known as Vaseline, under suspicion as a carcinogen in Breast Cancer - Petrolatum Banned in products in the EU - Long term damage to health becoming evident - side effects from impurities in the manufacturing process implicated in causing cancer!

Glycerine is a somewhat viscous clear oily liquid, with a sweet taste that is 3/4 sweeter than sugar. It is added to food products to keep them from becoming too dry. It is manufactured from petroleum, or from glyceride in fats, often as a by product in the production of soap. Here is a useless by-product of the soap making process:

Calcium Carbonate is a common substance found in rock in all parts of the world, and is the main component of shells of marine organisms, snails, pearls, and eggshells. Calcium carbonate is the active ingredient in agricultural lime, and is usually the principal cause of hard water. It is commonly used medicinally as a calcium supplement or as an antacid, but high consumption can be hazardous.(It's not what you think, please don't go sniffing it)

Stearyl Alcohol is a fatty alcohol. It takes the form of white solid granules or flakes which are insoluble in water. It is used in many cosmetics and probably your shampoo as an emulsifier and thickener.

Sodium Benzoate is a type of salt that may occur naturally in some foods but is more likely to be chemically produced and added as a preservative to foods. The reason it is used a lot is because it works very well at killing bacteria, yeast and fungi. Apparently not so good in face paint.

Aracia Senegal is made of hardened sap taken from two species of the acacia tree. It is used as a food stabilizer as well as a binder in paints.

Dextrin is a light carbohydrate obtained from heated starches (the crustiness of bread). It is used as a thickener and stabalizing agent in products.

Perfume For Body: ? All I can think of is the annoying lady at the department store who sprays samples on unsuspecting shoppers.



So most of the main ingredients come from petroleum, which is pretty gross when you think about it. However the main source of the products problem was probably a bad batch of sodium benzoate. This may bring up memories of the lead paint toys and it should, however, the fix is not boycotting Chinese made toys because that will never happen. We want cheap goods and we believe we deserve cheap goods. What needs to happen for Chinese goods or goods made from other countries is the workers in those countries need to be protected, economically and physically. Only then will we have safer imported products.

(To Be Continued)

I Still Despise Broccoli

The latest in what is becoming a long line of banned superbowl commercials (think GoDaddy.com) is by PETA. The commercial consists of women in lingerie licking and stroking various vegetables. see it for yourself:



First off, the commercial is over the top, which is a PETA trademark in its advertising, however it has nothing to do with treating animals ethically (most PETA commercials do not). Will it really get anyone who watches the superbowl to throw down their chicken wings covered in assorted flavors like tangy barbecue or triple hot kamikaze devil's goatee sauce or mild. (some people want to actually taste what their eating).

Are men going to really see this commercial and think, "yes, I am gonna eat that broccoli and arugula and have better sex?" Nope. They are going to think things like, "I wish I was that asparagus or I wonder what she's gonna do next with that pumpkin."

Peta is not alone in its vegetarian through sexism logic. Look at all the female contestants in GoVeg.com's sexiest vegetarian contest.

In short it's a bad commercial that perpetuates stereotypes and tries to use sex to sell abstaining from animal consumption in our diets. In spirit PETA is a good organization; in its dissemination of its information it fails miserably. Perhaps, this is a reason for the ill will towards PETA and its public image of a radical organization. Without fixing its persona, sexy vegetable adds will not help its tarnished image nor get its message across.

PETA could have discussed the environmental impact of reducing the consumption of meat. The environment being a well known topic of discussion, but I guess when you take the vegetables out of the bedroom they're not sexy enough to put in a superbowl ad.

The Sexy Scent of Meat

The company execs at Burger King must have been on a food high from the consumption of too many Whoppers when they ok'd their new fragrance. I say new, but apparently if you walk into any Burger KIng you would smell that fragrance or if you sat next to a Burger King worker on the bus.

Yes, the fragrance smells like flame-broiled meat.

(being a non-mammal eater, I never thought I would have a picture of hamburgers on this blog)

The Home of the Whopper calls it FLAME by BK. The website says:

The Whopper sandwich is America's favorite burger. Flame by BK captures the essence of that love and gives it to you. Behold the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat.

With a $3.95 price tag, the fragrance actually smells like a veiled attempt at a PR scheme. The news of the fragrance is all over the blogosphere and on the news just because of its absurdity. Look at the ad in all its uncomfortable consumer sexism.



Perhaps the marketing campaign will work and people will buy it just because it's hokey. I can't fathom why there is any other reason to purchase such a scent. Even if you wanted to smell like broiled-meat wouldn't it still be easier to rub steak sauce on yourself and stand next to a fire - I bet the scent will last longer.