Pirates

For most of us westerners it is easier to believe in a hard boiled egg bearing bunny than modern pirates hijacking oil tankers. But, pirate activity has been rising around the world due to unstable governments, which can not supply the needs of its citizens.


So what do modern pirates look like?





nope. Although I wish he were so people who really like music could get together and make him eat 1000 cheesburgers.








nope.






Nope. However if this were 1717 Edward “Blackbeard” Teach would be a real pirate. Blackbeard apparently “wove hemp into his beard and lit it on fire to scare his adversaries and to take the edge off. He was a bad ass



You Are A Pittsburgh Pirate via Noolmusic.com
Hell No.
(I’m not sure what’s sadder this song or this teams history.)


This is a modern day pirate.

For most of us westerners it is easier to believe in a hard boiled egg bearing bunny than modern pirates hijacking oil tankers. But, pirate activity has been rising around the world due to unstable governments, which can not supply the needs of its citizens.

According to Robert F. Worth’s report in The New York Times, there has been over 80 ships attacked off the coast of Somalia this year. “In September a Ukrainian freighter packed with tanks, antiaircraft guns and other heavy weapons was captured," writes Worth.

These pirates armed with modern guns take over ships over 100 times their small sailing vessels size.

The most recent standout amongst pirate conquest is the Saudi Arabian oil tanker with more than $100 million worth of crude oil.

The International Chamber of Commerce lists pirate encounters each week and has a map showing where piracy has taken place.

These pirates are not taking over ships because they’ve seen Pirates of the Caribbean 10 times and definitely not any of the sequels, which frankly turned me off to piracy for good and has me considering Johnny Depp to be a pandering jester to the masses. Really in the movie he’s like a clown without a red nose. A movie whose tag line is “Prepare to be blown out of the water” should give you the same disgusted feeling as walking in on your parents in the hot tub. Every time after, when they ask you how come you haven’t been using it you say, “I just don’t want to, ok” and then run straight to the toilet and dry heave for a couple of minutes, all the time knowing the only way to forget about it is to have sex in their bed while their away (you know you did that).


(look at the uncanny resemblance)

These pirates are after money. Why? Their governments aren’t working for them and piracy is a very lucrative endeavor.

Somalia has been an unstable country for the past 17 years. Its government has been in chaos and its people are starving. Poor government control has led to the rise of Somoli pirates who flaunt their money, buying businesses and constructing new buildings next to rundown shacks.

Somali officials say the pirates are on par to make a record $50 million in 2008 (hmm… sounds like a certain group who enjoy barrels in the United States).

So what does the world do? It sends warships from the United States, Russia, NATO, the European Union and India to patrol 2.5 million square miles of the Indian Ocean. So much for helping to stabilize a government and help its people out of poverty, violence, and starvation, I guess shipping lanes and protecting the oceans are more important. I think the whole thing resembles the war on drugs here in the United States. Instead of helping people with their circumstances, our government prefers the crack heads approach to keep the streets safe for sadly you and me.